Hey look, it's me posting!

I was going to change the name of my blog, since I'm no longer training for something. But the title is even more true to life now that I am officially on speed. After the spring and summer of running my legs off, I realized I needed more than running to live for. I need to be able to enjoy the other blessings in my life as well. I wasn't getting enjoyment out of anything except the running. So, I got a prescrip for Paxil first. That may have quieted my mind a little, but made me very tired and almost got me killed in a couple car accidents. And now I am using Celexa. I think I'm on about week 4. I wasn't able to run the first couple of weeks because of the muscle fatigue, but definitely not as bad as with the Paxil. Today was the first day since starting that I went running outdoors and was able to jog the entire time and not have to stop and walk. I think the side effects are subsiding. I feel a little bit less dark. I can see things around me that could be enjoyable. I can see the reason why I might want to clean the house or be with the kids. It sounds rediculous, but seriously I can't see the point in it when I'm at my worst. I would clean the house and still feel lousy, play with the kids and still feel lousy... nothing brought any kind of peace or satisfaction. I can see a little light at the end of the tunnel for the past few days. So.... BACK TO RUNNING.....

I'm not going to just pound the pavement like I did before. Since it's not going to be my sole coping machanism, I'm going to try and get a more rounded workout routine going. My husband bought this awesome Hoist home gym that has everything on it. Pullies, smith machine, chin-up bar... it's fun. So, I'm going to start using that seriously every other day instead of run. I also have always had the desire to get better at yoga. I've always felt so much better when I have more flexibility. That's going to become my new nighttime routine. Maybe if I run less, I'll actually get faster too. I'll let you know. I mean, I'll let me know. I'm sure there's no one reading this anymore!